It Was 21 Years Ago Today

8/24/24

21 years ago August 24, 2003 I became a mom. I became Jessica’s mommy. Child of mine, child of my heart.  Born in my heart long before I knew her. She was loved before I saw her face or learned her name. I thought of her everyday and she grew more and more in my heart and I couldn’t wait to meet her.

August 20, 2003 we met her for the first time. We went to lunch at Round Table Pizza with the kind people from Family Builders by Adoption.  Her social workers Gloria and Kevin were so happy for all of us, especially Jessica. Jessica had 4 pieces of pizza and chattered away playing with her new toy doctor set. Afterward I pushed her in a stroller to a park across the street near Lake Merritt in Oakland, California. She wore a light green dress and silly jelly shoes.

Now officially, The San Francisco Department of Human Services was responsible for placing Jessica in foster care and Family Builders was the organization that facilitated that. There had been some incidents in her previous foster home and there were some unknown’s about her heath history. The next day the county put up a stop sign for us and placing her with us was halted. I was devastated. My heart was breaking, I couldn’t breathe. Tears refusing to fall. Within 24 hours the county agreed to place Jessica with us as a “foster” child,  not “fost-adopt” until she was medically cleared. There are no guarantees they said.  What child comes with a guarantee?  I knew in my heart that everything would be ok, and it was.

On August 23, 2003 Jessica spent the day with us. Playing outside digging in the dirt, reading books, and eating her favorite food- green grapes.  That night a trip to Toys R Us was made for a sand box and toddler swimming pool. The next morning she came home for good. She had a pink cookie monster back pack filled with toys and books. She had another bag with several summer dresses, a pair of sweet little pajamas and a pair of “Blue’s Clue’s” shoes.  Friends and family started giving her clothes and toys, love and affection. 

After a couple of weeks of being tentative and tense, Jessica started to relax and trust. She was always loving, strong, stubborn, and bold. My heart continued to open. I never looked back.  Jessica is now 24 and still strong, stubborn, loving, beautiful, and creative.  My heart continues to grow in love. Forever and Always.